Despite taking action and despite ticking off the checkboxes of life that society tells you should bring you joy and fulfilment, you feel like something is missing.
You find it hard to find joy in your success. You find it hard to find joy in your journey, your efforts.
You struggle with the weight of constant self-doubt telling you that you aren’t really capable and you don’t really deserve it.
You’re constantly overthinking about what you’ve said and what you’ve done, wondering if you’re being secretly judged or criticised.
You make yourself small, afraid to speak up and assert your wants, needs, opinions and boundaries… leaving you feel unheard, unseen and unimportant.
You still haven’t fully experienced that sense of freedom you always longed for because you’re too trapped in your own mind.
Instead of being fully engaged and active in life, you feel passive.
Because despite all of the effort you make and despite your determination and grit, you’re faced with this overhanging dank cloud of negativity that you just can’t shake.
Instead of cheering yourself on you’re met with an inner critic that criticises you, belittles you and doubts you. Making every step that much harder to take.
Making every success that much harder to celebrate.
Making the path ahead seem foggy and increasingly out of reach.
It can all change, and it can change starting NOW.
A lifetime of experience has conditioned you to believe that self-sacrifice is noble and anything else is somehow ‘selfish’.
Instead of being taught to think independently, you’ve been taught to think DEPENDENTLY.
So here’s the tea… You need to re-learn how to THINK so that you can experience true freedom.
Confidence, joy, happiness, success, love and fulfilment all lie on the other side of your emotions… in your MIND. Emotional freedom is that one non-negotiable factor when seeking a true sense of FREEDOM. And if you want true freedom, we need to free you from the negative thinking patterns that have been holding you back in life.
It’s time to reprogram your belief system for one that works FOR you, not AGAINST you.
For over a decade I lived with severe social anxiety (and an immense fear of failure). I sabotaged every source of joy – from trying to build businesses and giving up way too soon, I gave up on an acting career because my anxiety made it too overwhelming to attend auditions, I lost friendships because I would cancel everything (last minute cancelation flakey friend over here!), A long term relationship ended because I was too intent on avoiding conflict that we never were able to address or resolve any tensions, I worked an 8am-6pm job at a car showroom in Mayfair which literally destroyed my soul because I didn’t feel as though I had any options.
Top that off with that usual daily hardships that come with anxiety like making a phonecall, getting on a bus or going to any sort of fun social event… it was pretty tough going.
But I realised something. After a year of exposure therapy to help my brain break the cycle of fearing social situations – I found that my anxiety had eased but I didn’t necessarily feel better.
I was all of the above; ambitious, driven, determined, intelligent (toot toot) and goal orientated – a real high achiever – and yet overcoming the anxiety didn’t help me the way I thought it would.
And that was because I still felt out of control.
I was still constantly worried about what people thought of me. I was still constantly comparing myself to everyone else. I was still feeling completely awkward about stepping out of the box that society likes to put us in and trying to take my life in a different direction – the direction I WANTED because, what are people going to think? And what will they think if I do all of this crazy stuff and FAIL?
But the reality is that your belief system isn’t set in stone. Your life isn’t set in stone.
And it all starts with you and the sponge inside your head. Life can take a 360 in just 12 short weeks if you’re willing to do the thought work and be open to CHANGE.
Life can be as amazing as you always dreamt it could be.
Time to stop dreaming x
Psssssst!! There is so much more! Every Monday I jump into your inbox with new, actionable advice from a standpoint of greater understanding yourself as a human being. Not easy, right?!